


Temporary Bliss

by lorenisnotcool



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Booty Calls, Destiel - Freeform, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Making Up, Mention of sex, Song fic, TA Cas, breaking up, cheesy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-06
Updated: 2014-11-06
Packaged: 2018-02-24 09:01:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2575772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lorenisnotcool/pseuds/lorenisnotcool
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean and Castiel had been dating for two years. But after a friend brings up the subject of marriage, they find out they both want different things.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Temporary Bliss

_You wanna come ovr?_

_Sent: 1:13 A.M._

_It’s 1:15 in the morning. What would we do?_

_Sent: 1:16 A.M._

_We could wtch a movie._

_Sent: 1:17 A.M._

_You have work tomorrow._

_Sent 1:19 A.M._

_Not til 10_

_Sent: 1:21 A.M._

_Go to bed Dean._

_Sent: 1:22 A.M._

_I miss you_

_Sent: 1:22 A.M._

_That’s your own fault._

_Sent: 1:25 A.M._

_Jst come ovr n we can tlk_

_Sent: 1:26 A.M._

_We won’t talk. You and I both know that._

_Sent: 1:27 A.M._

_Thts not a bad thing_

_Sent: 1:27 A.M._

_Yes it is. If you still want to talk you can call me tomorrow morning._

_Sent: 1:30 A.M._

_it is tomorrow morning_

_Sent: 1:31 A.M._

_Dean.. go to sleep._

_Sent: 1:31 A.M._

_I’ll sleep better with you here_

_Sent: 1:32 A.M._

_Dean.._

_Sent: 1:32 A.M._

_Just this 1 time_

_Sent: 1:34 A.M._

_That’s what you said last week._

_Sent: 1:35 A.M._

_We can talk tomorow_

_Sent: 1:36 A.M._

It was stupid. He shouldn’t be going over again. They broke up four months ago and he was still falling into Dean Winchester’s traps. They had dated for a little over two years, the subject of marriage got brought up (jokingly by one of their friends) and Dean said he would never get married. Now, Cas wasn’t one of the kids that couldn’t wait to grow up and meet their true love, get married, and have ten kids. He wanted to get married, not any time soon maybe in the next 7-10 years, but right now he was 22 and wasn’t stressing out about it. He loved Dean, but the thought of never being married… well he didn’t want to think about it. So when they went back to their apartment that night things didn’t go well at all.

“Did you wanna order out for dinner?” Dean asked, looking through the fridge, “I mean we have some eggs and bacon, but I’m not really in the mood for breakfast as dinner.” He sighed and closed the door. “Cas? You there?”

“Hm? Oh yeah, sure ordering out is fine.” Castiel was sat on the couch staring blankly at the television.

“Dude what’s up? You were quiet the whole ride home.” Dean sat next to him, placing one of his arms on the back of the couch to face him.

“Earlier, when you said you didn’t want to get married, you just meant like soon, right? You don’t want to be married in the next five years or anything.” Cas turned facing him, the question being left in the air.

“Uh,” Dean withdrew his arm, “No, I meant ever. I don’t know. Just after seeing my parents fight and then get divorced I just can’t picture myself being married. I wouldn’t want to end up like that.” Dean shrugged.

“We’re not your parents though, we could have a perfectly fine marriage.”

“Cas I don’t think now is the time for this conversation.”

“Then when? Next week? Four years from now when people are really asking if we’re going to be married soon and I have to lie and say I’m fine just dating you and never actually being committed to each other?”

“Where is this coming from? You have never once mentioned wanting to get married before!” Dean stood up from the couch.

“You never said you didn’t ever want to get married!” Cas stood up from the couch as well.

“I didn’t think it mattered right now, we’ve only been dating two years.”

“Two years isn’t exactly the same as two months, Dean. We already live together-“

“So it’s like we’re already married isn’t it? Why do you need some dumb ring and piece of paper to prove it?”

“It’s not about the ring or some “piece of paper” it’s about knowing we are 100% committed to each other! That we know what we have is the real thing and not something we can break off in ten minutes. Where this conversation seems to be going.” Cas huffed.

“Are you saying you want to break up?” Dean straightened up a bit and his eyebrows knitted together.

“If this isn’t going anywhere, then yeah maybe I do.” Cas crossed his arms over his chest.

“You’re willing to throw this away just because I don’t want to get married.”

“Neither of us is going to be happy if we stay in this relationship Dean. Either I’ll be unhappy because we’ll only ever be boyfriends or you’ll be unhappy because you were forced into marriage.”

“So the logical thing to do is break up.”

“I can’t be with you if I know there’s nothing this relationship is leading to.” Cas adverted his eyes towards the floor. He heard Dean say something that was inaudible and walk past him towards their room, the door shut, and was locked.

Cas’ things were moved out into another apartment within the week.

 

It started on a Tuesday night when Dean woke up, throwing his arm to left side of the bed looking for Cas. Only to find it empty. He’d only left three weeks ago and Dean was going crazy. They could’ve worked something out. Cas was right, they weren’t Dean’s parents. Sure they had their fights and slept back to back some nights, or even in different rooms if it got that bad. But they were usually dumb fights about Dean forgetting to send in the electricity bill or Cas not wanting to go out drinking with Dean’s friends. They moved past it and were happy again. And now for the first time in over a year and a half he was sleeping alone and it sucked. He missed waking up with Cas thrown on top of him after a long day of work. Or Cas shaking him awake at 3 a.m. because Dean stole all the blankets but there’s a marathon of Full House right now and they should watch it because, “It just started!”

Texting him at 2:46 in the morning wouldn’t be weird right? Just to see what he was up to. They hadn’t talked since the night of their fight. Maybe Cas would call him and they could sort things out.

_U awake?_

_Sent 2:47 A.M._

_Yes… Why are you awake?_

_Sent: 2:50 A.M._

_I could ask u the same question._

_Sent 2:51 A.M._

_I got off work late and had some papers to go over. Now why are you awake?_

_Sent: 2:53 A.M._

He always worked too hard. He was super smart, started taking college courses at fourteen and graduate with his AA by the time he was 17 and his BA at 19. He got his Master’s last year and was still shadowing one of the professors at the university. Of course he was still awake.

_Couldn’t sleep._

_Sent: 2:57 A.M._

_Well you should try._

_Sent: 2:58 A.M._

_I could sleep if you were here_

_Sent: 2:59 A.M._

_I shouldnt have said that sorry_

_Sent: 2:59 A.M._

_No you shouldn’t have. Goodnight Dean._

_Sent: 3:00 A.M._

_Come over._

_Sent: 3:00 A.M._

_Why should I?_

_Sent: 3:01 A.M._

_bc we would both sleep better_

_Sent: 3:02 A.M._

_Okay. But just tonight._

_Sent: 3:06 A.M._

_The doors unlocked_

_Sent: 3:08 A.M._

He was there in less than fifteen minutes. When he walked in Dean was waiting at the kitchen table, hair flat on one side and stuck up on the other.

“Well it looks like you were sleeping well.” Cas gave a small smile. Gesturing to Dean’s hair.

“Oh yeah. Just woke up and it was weird with you here.” He shrugged. Cas closed the door behind him and Dean took a moment to notice the state he was in. He looked thinner for some reason, he had circles starting to form under his eyes like he couldn’t sleep either. God, what did he do?

“Are we gonna stay here all night or should I just leave and go back home?” _This is your home._ Dean thought to himself.

“No, we can go in the room.” He stood up from the table, pushing the chair back in and walking towards the bedroom, shutting the light off as they left the kitchen. It seemed natural, just crawling back into bed with each other. Cas folded his glasses up and put them on the nightstand, slipping underneath the sheets, turning to look towards Dean who was already staring back at him in the dark. “I missed you.” He heard him whisper.

“I shouldn’t have come.” Cas whispered back, feeling Dean shift closer to him.

“I wanted you here though.” He brought his hand up to Cas’ face, leaning his forehead against his and pressed their lips together. It felt like they were okay again. Like they hadn’t been apart for three weeks. Dean pushed his hand against Cas’ shoulder, making him lie on his back. He rolled on top of him, not breaking their kiss.

“Dean,” Cas pulled away, looking up at him, “is this why you called me over? For sex?”

“What? No, of course I didn’t.” Dean sat up as Cas pushed himself up on his elbows.

“That’s what it feels like.” He tilted his head and his eyes went wide at a sudden realization. “Oh god.” He said before sitting up fully, pushing Dean off and to the side. “Oh god this was a booty call wasn’t it? How could I be so dumb?” He put his face in his hands, bringing his knees up to his chest.

“Cas, no! I swear I didn’t text you to come over here for sex, I promise.” He placed a hand on his shoulder, but Cas shrugged it off.

“No don’t touch me.” He snapped and got up out of the bed. Grabbing his glasses and putting them on. “I shouldn’t have come.” He shook his head and started walking out.

“You don’t have to leave!” Dean got up after him.

“So you would’ve been fine just lying there? Not having sex, not cuddling, just sleeping.” Cas stopped in the hallway to look at him.

“Of course! I lov-“

“No. Don’t you fucking dare. You don’t say that to me, Winchester.” Cas growled and walked out of the apartment, grabbing his shoes by the front door and leaving.

 

It went on from there. Dean texting him randomly while he was at work, asking what he was up to. Even though he knew where he was. It wasn’t like his schedule changed suddenly. He texted him at midnight to remind him all the 90’s shows were being played right now. Maybe he could come over and they would watch it together. And Cas being Cas, of course he went over. The fucked on the couch the first time he went back. Dean’s face pressed against the cushion while Cas covered his body on top of him. When Cas’ plans fell through on a Saturday night, Dean told him to come over for a late dinner. His hands were pinned above him, heels digging into Dean’s back, while Dean fucked him against the wall. He left at 4:37 that morning while Dean was asleep beside him. They went out to see a movie together two months after they broke up, but one month into suddenly becoming friends with benefits. Or ex with benefits. Dean dropped him off at his apartment and kissed him before he got out of the car. Month three consisted of a lot of two A.M. breakfasts and having sex in the bedroom. Cas never stayed later than an hour after Dean fell asleep.

Dean pretended not to notice.

And now here he was again, month four. Still showing up at Dean’s doorstep. What used to be _their_ doorstep. Opening the door, because of course it would be unlocked already. Slipping off his shoes and kicking them off to the side, socks padding against the floor, going into the bedroom where Dean was laying down staring at the TV, curled up in blankets. He walked to the other side of the bed and laid down next to Dean, pulling the blankets up to his chest, and started to stare at the TV too.

“You came.” Dean said after a while. Still staring at the television where a group of men were playing poker.

“I always come.” Cas said back. Dean looked over at him before moving closer and placing an arm over Cas’ waist, laying his head on his pillow.

“I miss this.” He tried to keep his voice steady. Seeing Cas almost every weekend was great. But when he woke up in the morning and he wasn’t there it felt like a stab in the gut. Like what they were doing was just hooking up.

“I know.” Cas nodded and sighed.

Dean pushed himself up and looked down at Cas, “Stay the night tonight. Don’t leave after I’ve fallen asleep. Just stay here and sleep for once. Can you do that?” Cas didn’t answer for a few seconds.

“I can’t do that.” His face showed no emotion. Just staring blankly at the TV.

“Why not? What’s stopping you?” Dean persisted.

“If I stay this will become more than just sex. This will start with you making breakfast for me again, and my clothes suddenly in your closet. You buying my favorite peanut butter and making sure it’s always in the cabinets. Our friends thinking we’re back together. Sam coming over on a Sunday morning and seeing us lying on the couch and thinking we’re okay again. Which we’re not. This will become us dating again if I stay over. And I can’t let myself do that.”

“Why can’t you? Why can’t we date again? Hell we’re practically doing it now! We go out to dinner, see movies together, have sex. Cas what we’re doing is dating.”

Cas sat up and looked at Dean, “It’s not dating because I’m not letting my emotions get involved. If I do that, then it’s dating. We go out to dinner and movies as friends. We have sex. We’re nothing more than friends with benefits.”

“Don’t say that. Because you know it’s not true.” Dean grabbed his hand.

“Let me believe that. Because I can’t do this again, Dean. I can’t fall back into this and believe this can work out. It’s not going to.”

“So what happens? I can’t,” His voice cracked, “I can’t just keep sleeping with you. This is hurting me just as much as it hurts you,” Cas went to say something but Dean stopped him before he could, “Don’t say this isn’t hurting you, I know it is. I can see it. When you’re here, you’re distant. You’re cutting yourself off, but I know this is tearing you apart like it’s tearing me apart. So don’t you dare say when you leave each time you don’t stop and run your fingers through my hair or kiss my forehead, because I feel It every damn time.”

“Dean.” Cas whispered before his shoulders slumped and he looked into his eyes for some sort of guidance. Before Dean knew it, he had Cas in his lap and his arms wrapped around his back. His face was pressed into his neck. Dean wrapped his arms around Cas and started rubbing small circles with his thumbs. “I don’t know what to do anymore. I can’t sleep, I miss you so much. I can’t keep doing this. But I can’t cut you out of my life, it’s too difficult. I don’t know what to do.”

“Come back. Just come back and we can work everything out. We can talk it through. I can’t do this either, it takes every ounce in my body to not tell you I love you every time I see you walk through that door. Please just come home.” Dean pressed a kiss to Cas’ temple. Feeling his shirt become damp.

“I can’t come back if it’s going to end up like last time. I told you I can’t be with you if-“

“I know, I know. I don’t want to be without you. I can’t imagine being with anyone else. I’m not saying tomorrow we’re gonna fix everything and go to the courthouse with two rings we got from a pawn shop,” Cas sat up to look at Dean face to face, “but, I know not everyone ends up divorced, and I’m asking you not to expect some sort of proposal in the next two years or anything. But I think I can see us getting married at some point.” He stopped when Cas’ hands were on his face and so were his lips. Pushing him back onto the bed.

“I love you so much, Dean Winchester.” He smiled and kissed him again.

“So, will you stay the night?” He gave a small laugh.

“Only the night? From what you just said I think you just asked me to move back in with you and maybe spend the rest of my life with you.” Cas laughed.

“Shut up.” He rolled his eyes, “Will you though?” He searched his eyes for an answer.

“Yes, of course I will.” Cas pressed his forehead to Dean’s.

“Wait, to which one?” Dean asked.

“All three. But the whole rest of our lives thing, I think you should come up with a better proposal. Because if that was it, I’m very disappointed.”

Dean laughed and rolled them over, “Give me a couple of years to come up with a better way to ask.” He leaned down to kiss him.

“Well if it’s gonna take you a couple of years, I expect a huge musical number with backup dancers and a very expensive ring.”

“Hm, I think I can make that happen,” he laid down beside him, wrapping his arms around his waist, “But you’ll come back home?” He asked in a quiet voice, as if he was afraid Cas would say no.

“We need to talk some things out. And get my landlord to let me out of my lease. But I’ll come back to you each time you ask, Dean.” Cas replied.

“Okay.” Dean yawned and settled closer to Cas, laying his head on his chest, “I’ll call tomorrow and see where I can find a venue for a musical marriage proposal.” He felt Cas chuckle before he started running his fingers through his hair.

“That sounds perfect.”

 

Two days later Cas was moved back into their apartment and a note hung on the fridge reading:

 

** I O U ONE MUSICAL MARRIAGE PROPOSAL **

**Author's Note:**

> I know I need to be working on To Drift part 3, but sometimes I just need to write a few short fics to get me going. I hope you enjoyed!


End file.
